Tuesday, 12 September 2017

Zzzzzzzzzzen & The Art Of Motorcycling: A Few Words of Thanks From David

A few of you have got wind of David's motorcycle mishap and have very kindly been enquiring after him. I'll let him bring you up to date himself, only adding - he can't bear to think it, let alone say it - that his bike (it was brand new) was totalled.

Here's an artist's impression of the motorbike crash as it actually happened. Roughly. Sort of…


And here's David…

How's this for a beaut. The law over here holds that falling asleep is a voluntary act - "oh, I think I'll freshen up by catching 40 winks between Solent Road and West End Lane" - and therefore amounts to dangerous driving, which of course is an offence and liable to prosecution, a fine, gaol time, etc. (I hope they've got Wifi, a fridge full of Dunkel, and the complete works of Immanuel Kant in Wormwood Scrubs [was ever prison apter named?].)

Whereas if you black out that's not voluntary. You have to surrender your license because it means you're epileptic - a spellbinding instance of medical detection and diagnosis - but at least there's no time inside and no fine.

I told them I'd whited out and that seemed to do the trick.

Yeah, getting better, though the impact was so refreshing - I like to dwell on it - I often wonder if I wasn't a fatality and this is some sort of parallel universe I was "passed away" to on that fateful Sunday afternoon.

Rib bruisage seems to be gone. And I get my replacement molar just before Christmas. He screwed in the implant last week. The cocktail of drugs worked a treat though I could have done with an injection in each ear drum. It sounded like a road resurfacing operation, which held my attention. It was like having cymbals meet midway between my ears. And then for a couple of days afterwards complete strangers were gently suggesting that maybe I should think about swallowing the whole grapefruit I appeared to have "inconspicuously" tucked into the left side of my mouth.

A London Walk costs £10 – £8 concession. To join a London Walk, simply meet your guide at the designated tube station at the appointed time. Details of all London Walks can be found at www.walks.com.

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